I could make it all worthwhile as a rock n' roll star

David Bowie performing as Ziggy Stardust

My drawings lately are turning out to be still lifes. WTF. How not to push the envelope. How not to be now. How fuddy. How duddy.

My pressure is to include something slightly ironic. Or kitsch. Something tongue and cheek. But only in a back-handed way so it doesn't come off as intentionally ironic or kitsch. Because then it’s ok to be those things. Because I want to be cool. I guess that’s the word. What am I, in middle school?

I don’t know: a box of condoms, a book with an approved title, a cut of meat. When I put it this it way, I think I’ll stick with the bottles.  

Once I heard Guston say that if you don’t experience something in making the painting, it’s not done. I get that. I’m afraid I’m making work that looks like art, but that is just fooling me.

I want to make a drawing that reads like Savage Detectives by Roberto Bolaños or sounds like David Bowie's “Starman.”